03/01/14
It recently came to my attention that I'm liking creepy things. Not like, "staring-into-people's-windows-with-a-telescope" creepy. No. Just "kinda-fascinated-by-stuff-that's-rather-odd" creepy. So, I thought maybe you'd all like to see/hear some of the creepy things that I'm digging on. Maybe it'll be too creepy for you. Maybe this won't be creepy enough for you--which would make me think you're extra creepy. So, maybe I'll like you more, since I'm into creepy things right now. Unless I decide you're too creepy to be on my list of cool, creepy things. Then, I won't talk to you anymore.
Creepy Thing #1 - Weird Al's "Good Old Days"
This has always been one of my favorite songs from Al. The lyrics are ridiculous, and it makes many people uncomfortable. That's why I like it:
Creepy Thing #2 - Flight of the Conchords "If You're Into It"
I never really got into this show big time, but I've seen snippets of it, and I love these guys. This song is hilarious. Slightly mature content--but amazing. Worst of all, the song sticks in my head for hours. But, it's creepy. So it's okay.
Creepy Thing #3 - The Best Scenes from "Freaks"
This is considered a horror film classic. Something about this "highlight reel" is perfect, so I don't feel the need to see the entire movie. But, wow. I feel like there's a lot of people from Niles who are like this.
Creepy Thing #4 - Sid Vicious/Justice breaking his ankle
If you're squeamish, don't watch this next one. But if you aren't, check it out. It's my favorite wrestling injury ever, if one were creepy enough to rank those. Which I'm not. Probably.
Creepy Thing #5 - This song I used to hear when I was a kid
My mom thought it was funny to play this song for me when I was a kid. I was pretty young. We had it on a 45, I think. But I never liked it, because being in a backseat with seven girls kissing me made me feel squishy inside when I was 6.
Okay. So those are the creepy things I kinda like at the moment. Now I'm gonna go stare into my neighbor's kitchen window for two hours.
Saturday, March 1, 2014
Monday, December 30, 2013
Looking back on 2-0-1-3
Moments of 2013 That will Stick with me:
1. My father-in-law's surgery
This man is a hero to me. He's treated me like his own son. He built our home from scratch. He raised my wife to be the awesome girl I fell in love with and married. He fought in Vietnam. Most importantly, he's a genuine human being who always wants to help others around him. Seeing Jimmy on the brink, during a life-threatening surgery, really hit home and furthered my understanding of my own mortality. He's healthy again, and has his vibrancy back. I'm thankful for that every day.
2. Seeing my nephew growing up
Everett is getting so big, and I can see him "growing" his own personality as well. It's amazing to watch. Because he's in Cleveland, I only get to see him once or twice a month. But I cherish those moments, and I want him to realize how important he is to his family as he grows older. I'm proud of my brother and sister-in-law for the parents that they are--and I want to help with this unforgettable process, because it is the most important thing we do.
3. 49ers losing a Super Bowl
Ah. That sucked a lot. Me not happy. Me want to kick Ray Lewis in face. That was holding, by the way.
4. My job changing
Several of the changes in the educational system are killing the joy of what I do. That's a big deal. I know there's nothing I can do to stop the paradigm shift. I just have to figure out how to adapt, and how to cope. But, the joy had better return soon. Very soon. I've never been afraid to take risks in my life, once the joy of my current situation is gone.
5. Erin's "creative" tasks
Erin D. has always been super crafty. If you throw her in a room with 100 people, she'll be one of the three craftiest people in the joint. But, seeing the jewelry/bracelets/pendants that she's making is ASTOUNDING. She makes the things that people WANT to wear and show-off. I am floored by her skill. She's using blow torches and silver clay alloys and shit. It's something to see.
6. Blizzard dying
Yeah, finding your pet dead is an experience. I literally just stood there for a few moments looking into his cage, just trying to process it. Like, he's never laid down like that before. That can't be good. Honestly, bunnies aren't great pets. They don't show much affection and they always think they're food for you, because you're a huge creature. But Blizzard was a gentle animal, and we had him for about seven years. It impacted me a lot more than I anticipated. I wrote a damn song about it, for crying out loud. A song. For a rabbit.
7. Listening to good people
Several things throughout the year made me realize how easy it is to pick out bad people. You know, everyone has faults. But some people are so caught up in "being who they are"--that you just realize they're not very nice people. So, I want to be around nice people. And I want to listen to them. Intently. All of the time. It just feels great to hear what kind people have to say--about anything and everything. It fills me up with positivity and happiness. I will still pretend to listen to people that I know ARE NOT nice people. But I won't really be listening. And they won't be able to tell. Because they're not nice people. They don't care if I'm really listening.
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Here were my goals for 2013, as set forth at the end of 2012:
Goals for 2013
1. Finish a solo album.
I'm giving myself a point for this because I know what songs I'm going to USE for aforementioned solo album. I'm going to be mixing all of my stuff from this year with my dude Josh Roman, so he'll help me make them "pro" So, 1 point.
2. Clean my garage, and organize it.
Oh my God, it's gotten worse this year, not better. I think a family of baby chimps may be living and procreating under my car in the evenings. Zero points.
3. Finish seven video games, in their entirety.
I did this, including GTA 5 and The Last of Us. A few sports games thrown in as well. 1 point.
4. Learn guitar--the basic chords, at least. This will help me in my songwriting SO much.
Nope, I can't lie. I still only know a handful of chords. But, as you'll see reading on, this goal isn't lost forever. Zero.
5. Release KKC's "Seven Deadly Sins"--there's no WAY I'm not getting this point at the end of the year.
Gad, don't I have egg on my face? Still unrecorded (though fully written). Shit. Zero points.
6. Release one new song every week (or cover tune) on Soundcloud--it must be posted by the end of Friday night--except if I'm on, like, vacation or something.
I'm gonna take a second here. I just typed this goal that night in 2012 so nonchalantly. I had NO clue what was involved. You're looking at 5-10 hours, every week. It's like an extra day of work, each and every week. And I did it. I never missed a Friday. When I had a sore throat, I wrote instrumentals. Once, I stayed up until 3 am on a work night. But I did it. I'm so proud of this accomplishment, and I'll tell everyone how proud I am. What an experience! 1 huge-ass point.
7. Get Erin an online jewelry store. The stuff she's making is AWESOME, so I MUST get her stuff up for sale.
Half a point. I listed a ton of items, then I realized that I didn't know what the hell I was talking about in the item descriptions. Like, what stones are these? What is an opal? We also realized an Etsy store is the way to go. I'm getting this done. Soon. 1/2 pt.
8. Keep this home consistently clean.
I have to say, it slipped once or twice. But, for the most part, success! In fact, I'm typing this entry with fresh dish-pan hands. 1 point.
9. Become a better golfer. No "set score" this year.
No question, I got better. More consistent. I started around 100 for 18, and by the middle of July, I was around 90-92 per round. Hitting the ball better. And I'm calmer. I own my temper now. One point.
10. Read six books--for fun. Not because I have to.
I failed miserably. I read TWO books for fun by the end of March. Then, I never got around to reading another. Sucks to suck so suckily. Zero points.
So, this year, I get 5.5 of 10. Last year, I got 4.5--so, improvement.
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Now, I change this tradition of mine. This year, I'm setting three goals. Just three.
Goals for 2014:
1. Write (literature and/or music--but MOSTLY, literature)
2. Publish (literature and/or music--but MOSTLY music)
3. Get better at playing piano and guitar
That's it. If I do those three things, that would be a HUGE accomplishment. Setting my sights on menial tasks like "garage cleaning" and "basement overhauls"--well, it doesn't get shit done. I hardly ever accomplish it. So why plan to do so? I'm gunning for these three goals. I want to keep creating things. So happy to be done with my FNT adventures. But, I will keep pushing myself. I swear.
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My Favorite Albums of 2013:
11. Real to Reel (Movie Soundtrack)
10. The Devil Put Dinosaurs Here (Alice In Chains)
9. The Invisible Way (Low)
8. 13 (Black Sabbath)
7. The Next Day (David Bowie)
6. Earth Rocker (Clutch)
5. The Diving Board (Elton John)
4. Infestissumam (Ghost B.C.)
3. The Raven That Refused to Sing and Other Stories (Steven Wilson)
2. Surgical Steel (Carcass)
1. Opposites (Biffy Clyro)
(Some of) My Favorite Songs of 2013:
"Sirens" by Pearl Jam
"White Hats/Black Hats" by Tomahawk
"I Appear Missing" by Queens of the Stone Age
"Ghuleh/Zombie Queen" by Ghost B.C.
"Royals" by Lorde
"The Raven That Refused to Sing" by Steven Wilson
"Holy Ghost" by Low
"Young at Heart" by Michael Buble
"Only Love" by Alkaline Trio
"Home Again" by Elton John
"Applause" by Lady Gaga
"Cadaver Pouch Conveyor System" by Carcass
"Ruthless" by Devildriver
"It's My Time" by Filter
"Biblical" by Biffy Clyro
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Thanks for reading about my year. I hope the next 12 months find you all healthy and happy. I want to give high fives to all of you. Remind me of that next time I see you. And I'll give you one.
1. My father-in-law's surgery
This man is a hero to me. He's treated me like his own son. He built our home from scratch. He raised my wife to be the awesome girl I fell in love with and married. He fought in Vietnam. Most importantly, he's a genuine human being who always wants to help others around him. Seeing Jimmy on the brink, during a life-threatening surgery, really hit home and furthered my understanding of my own mortality. He's healthy again, and has his vibrancy back. I'm thankful for that every day.
2. Seeing my nephew growing up
Everett is getting so big, and I can see him "growing" his own personality as well. It's amazing to watch. Because he's in Cleveland, I only get to see him once or twice a month. But I cherish those moments, and I want him to realize how important he is to his family as he grows older. I'm proud of my brother and sister-in-law for the parents that they are--and I want to help with this unforgettable process, because it is the most important thing we do.
3. 49ers losing a Super Bowl
Ah. That sucked a lot. Me not happy. Me want to kick Ray Lewis in face. That was holding, by the way.
4. My job changing
Several of the changes in the educational system are killing the joy of what I do. That's a big deal. I know there's nothing I can do to stop the paradigm shift. I just have to figure out how to adapt, and how to cope. But, the joy had better return soon. Very soon. I've never been afraid to take risks in my life, once the joy of my current situation is gone.
5. Erin's "creative" tasks
Erin D. has always been super crafty. If you throw her in a room with 100 people, she'll be one of the three craftiest people in the joint. But, seeing the jewelry/bracelets/pendants that she's making is ASTOUNDING. She makes the things that people WANT to wear and show-off. I am floored by her skill. She's using blow torches and silver clay alloys and shit. It's something to see.
6. Blizzard dying
Yeah, finding your pet dead is an experience. I literally just stood there for a few moments looking into his cage, just trying to process it. Like, he's never laid down like that before. That can't be good. Honestly, bunnies aren't great pets. They don't show much affection and they always think they're food for you, because you're a huge creature. But Blizzard was a gentle animal, and we had him for about seven years. It impacted me a lot more than I anticipated. I wrote a damn song about it, for crying out loud. A song. For a rabbit.
7. Listening to good people
Several things throughout the year made me realize how easy it is to pick out bad people. You know, everyone has faults. But some people are so caught up in "being who they are"--that you just realize they're not very nice people. So, I want to be around nice people. And I want to listen to them. Intently. All of the time. It just feels great to hear what kind people have to say--about anything and everything. It fills me up with positivity and happiness. I will still pretend to listen to people that I know ARE NOT nice people. But I won't really be listening. And they won't be able to tell. Because they're not nice people. They don't care if I'm really listening.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Here were my goals for 2013, as set forth at the end of 2012:
Goals for 2013
1. Finish a solo album.
I'm giving myself a point for this because I know what songs I'm going to USE for aforementioned solo album. I'm going to be mixing all of my stuff from this year with my dude Josh Roman, so he'll help me make them "pro" So, 1 point.
2. Clean my garage, and organize it.
Oh my God, it's gotten worse this year, not better. I think a family of baby chimps may be living and procreating under my car in the evenings. Zero points.
3. Finish seven video games, in their entirety.
I did this, including GTA 5 and The Last of Us. A few sports games thrown in as well. 1 point.
4. Learn guitar--the basic chords, at least. This will help me in my songwriting SO much.
Nope, I can't lie. I still only know a handful of chords. But, as you'll see reading on, this goal isn't lost forever. Zero.
5. Release KKC's "Seven Deadly Sins"--there's no WAY I'm not getting this point at the end of the year.
Gad, don't I have egg on my face? Still unrecorded (though fully written). Shit. Zero points.
6. Release one new song every week (or cover tune) on Soundcloud--it must be posted by the end of Friday night--except if I'm on, like, vacation or something.
I'm gonna take a second here. I just typed this goal that night in 2012 so nonchalantly. I had NO clue what was involved. You're looking at 5-10 hours, every week. It's like an extra day of work, each and every week. And I did it. I never missed a Friday. When I had a sore throat, I wrote instrumentals. Once, I stayed up until 3 am on a work night. But I did it. I'm so proud of this accomplishment, and I'll tell everyone how proud I am. What an experience! 1 huge-ass point.
7. Get Erin an online jewelry store. The stuff she's making is AWESOME, so I MUST get her stuff up for sale.
Half a point. I listed a ton of items, then I realized that I didn't know what the hell I was talking about in the item descriptions. Like, what stones are these? What is an opal? We also realized an Etsy store is the way to go. I'm getting this done. Soon. 1/2 pt.
8. Keep this home consistently clean.
I have to say, it slipped once or twice. But, for the most part, success! In fact, I'm typing this entry with fresh dish-pan hands. 1 point.
9. Become a better golfer. No "set score" this year.
No question, I got better. More consistent. I started around 100 for 18, and by the middle of July, I was around 90-92 per round. Hitting the ball better. And I'm calmer. I own my temper now. One point.
10. Read six books--for fun. Not because I have to.
I failed miserably. I read TWO books for fun by the end of March. Then, I never got around to reading another. Sucks to suck so suckily. Zero points.
So, this year, I get 5.5 of 10. Last year, I got 4.5--so, improvement.
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Now, I change this tradition of mine. This year, I'm setting three goals. Just three.
Goals for 2014:
1. Write (literature and/or music--but MOSTLY, literature)
2. Publish (literature and/or music--but MOSTLY music)
3. Get better at playing piano and guitar
That's it. If I do those three things, that would be a HUGE accomplishment. Setting my sights on menial tasks like "garage cleaning" and "basement overhauls"--well, it doesn't get shit done. I hardly ever accomplish it. So why plan to do so? I'm gunning for these three goals. I want to keep creating things. So happy to be done with my FNT adventures. But, I will keep pushing myself. I swear.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My Favorite Albums of 2013:
11. Real to Reel (Movie Soundtrack)
10. The Devil Put Dinosaurs Here (Alice In Chains)
9. The Invisible Way (Low)
8. 13 (Black Sabbath)
7. The Next Day (David Bowie)
6. Earth Rocker (Clutch)
5. The Diving Board (Elton John)
4. Infestissumam (Ghost B.C.)
3. The Raven That Refused to Sing and Other Stories (Steven Wilson)
2. Surgical Steel (Carcass)
1. Opposites (Biffy Clyro)
(Some of) My Favorite Songs of 2013:
"Sirens" by Pearl Jam
"White Hats/Black Hats" by Tomahawk
"I Appear Missing" by Queens of the Stone Age
"Ghuleh/Zombie Queen" by Ghost B.C.
"Royals" by Lorde
"The Raven That Refused to Sing" by Steven Wilson
"Holy Ghost" by Low
"Young at Heart" by Michael Buble
"Only Love" by Alkaline Trio
"Home Again" by Elton John
"Applause" by Lady Gaga
"Cadaver Pouch Conveyor System" by Carcass
"Ruthless" by Devildriver
"It's My Time" by Filter
"Biblical" by Biffy Clyro
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Thanks for reading about my year. I hope the next 12 months find you all healthy and happy. I want to give high fives to all of you. Remind me of that next time I see you. And I'll give you one.
Saturday, March 2, 2013
The VA blog--the times, they are a changin'
03/02/13
I'm chilling at the VA hospital in Cleveland right now, waiting for Erin D to come out from visiting my father-in-law. He had surgery to repair an aneurysm in his abdomen--then in about three weeks, they're going to do his heart. These are big surgeries, but he'll be a new man at 70, if all goes according to plan. He built our home from the ground up with his bare hands. He fought in Vietnam. He did a damn fine job of raising a daughter who I would come to love at an indescribable level. So, I want him to be okay again. He's a second father to me, quite literally.
I'm chilling at the VA hospital in Cleveland right now, waiting for Erin D to come out from visiting my father-in-law. He had surgery to repair an aneurysm in his abdomen--then in about three weeks, they're going to do his heart. These are big surgeries, but he'll be a new man at 70, if all goes according to plan. He built our home from the ground up with his bare hands. He fought in Vietnam. He did a damn fine job of raising a daughter who I would come to love at an indescribable level. So, I want him to be okay again. He's a second father to me, quite literally.
But I'm fighting a cold. I don't think going in to visit him would be kosher, because the last thing he needs is illness. So, I'm blogging and writing song lyrics in a dark waiting area. It's quite serene.
I posted the lyrics on FB. It's a song I wrote in my head as I was driving up to Cleveland Thursday to pick up D. I can't wait to record it this week.
On the working front, I'm scared. There are a lot of changes coming down the pike. The new assessments our government is implementing in 2014--they're game changers. They're practically ACT level in difficulty. A lot of schools which are currently ranked "excellent" are going to be dropping below proficient very soon. Get ready, Merica. People are making decisions who went to high school and college before the Internet existed--and they're making moves that will directly impact your children. I wish others were as concerned as those who are trained in education. But, they're not. Because they're not telling you. But I am. It's coming.
So, I've been thinking about other options. I've looked into a few doctoral programs. However, this would lead me down the path of college professorship--which I always considered. Higher education will be equally impacted by these changes in 2016. So, that's not really a sensible solution.
Retail wasn't fun, but I was pretty good at it. Once again, the Inturnetzz had shifted the paradigm of retail as well. I think, within 10-15 years, many of our shopping centers might be disappearing. We'll be forced back into the era of skilled craftsmen--because most commerce will occur in the invisible world.
So, I'm miffed. I planned on teaching HS for 15 years, then moving on to teaching at the college level. Well, it's been 13 years. The men with the pens are changing everything, without regard to the endgame. Are these tests really going to make us compete with India--who has more honor students than we have TOTAL students, period? No. But they feel like they have to try something, and the blame must go somewhere.
It's going to go on my profession. I just know it. The waves are getting larger.
Tuesday, February 19, 2013
Stuff that's happening
02/19/13
I've done a fairly shitty job of keeping up with this--though I fully intended to do so from the start. However, it's not been from a lack of creativity. Musically, this is the busiest I've ever been. I've been writing/recording one song a week in the Bee Hive. Getting better at the whole mixing thing. Problem is often that I mix the levels too high, and then, when I try to boost/master it, the whole things turns into an auditory fuzz ball. I really should learn from people who know what in the hell they're doing. But, I go out there during my one day a week I find free time after school--and that doesn't always fit in with the people who are in the know. So, I struggle.
Truthfully, I want to get others involved in fridaynighttracks.com
I think it's got potential to be something a lot of local musicians could do--it's a great motivator. Even if I'm only getting 25-30 plays a week, it's still something. Not to mention, I've got some great short story ideas to go along with some of these tunes. Some weeks, I'm very proud of what I've created. For example, "The Walls" this week saddens me when I hear it--so I think that's mission accomplished. I was in a cloudy mood when I wrote it, and I think it speaks to that end. Other weeks, I see a lot of room for improvement. This week's tune is going to be a cover--not sure which one. But, I've gotta record it tomorrow or Thursday, so I guess I'd better pick one quickly.
KKC is just going to pick a day near the end of April and set a studio date. We'll be ready, because we HAVE to be. We've gone over six years without releasing any new music, and that's really inexcusable. We're gonna make it up to our fan base, though. We want to do one EP every six months after this for a few years. We've got the resources here now--I've just gotta sharpen my craft a bit.
The Seven Deadly Sins has been in the works for quite a while. I think it's gonna be about 21 songs--14 straight on KKC tunes, and 7 instrumentals. It's quite epic and very dark. It makes me happy to know that when people mention heavy music from this area, most people will mention Kitchen Knife Conspiracy at some point. We're very proud of that. So, we want to play some shows and get this new music out there. However, this is the first time we've ever said, "Eh, let's just not set a studio date until we're ready"--and what do ya know--it's been six years. The singer change slowed things down for a while, but now, it's on us.
Okay. That's it. I've gotta go and file taxes--which is always a pain in the ass. Like that money, doe. If we get any. Gonna get me one of dem free Obama phones.
God. I hate Tea party/Hillbillies.
I've done a fairly shitty job of keeping up with this--though I fully intended to do so from the start. However, it's not been from a lack of creativity. Musically, this is the busiest I've ever been. I've been writing/recording one song a week in the Bee Hive. Getting better at the whole mixing thing. Problem is often that I mix the levels too high, and then, when I try to boost/master it, the whole things turns into an auditory fuzz ball. I really should learn from people who know what in the hell they're doing. But, I go out there during my one day a week I find free time after school--and that doesn't always fit in with the people who are in the know. So, I struggle.
Truthfully, I want to get others involved in fridaynighttracks.com
I think it's got potential to be something a lot of local musicians could do--it's a great motivator. Even if I'm only getting 25-30 plays a week, it's still something. Not to mention, I've got some great short story ideas to go along with some of these tunes. Some weeks, I'm very proud of what I've created. For example, "The Walls" this week saddens me when I hear it--so I think that's mission accomplished. I was in a cloudy mood when I wrote it, and I think it speaks to that end. Other weeks, I see a lot of room for improvement. This week's tune is going to be a cover--not sure which one. But, I've gotta record it tomorrow or Thursday, so I guess I'd better pick one quickly.
KKC is just going to pick a day near the end of April and set a studio date. We'll be ready, because we HAVE to be. We've gone over six years without releasing any new music, and that's really inexcusable. We're gonna make it up to our fan base, though. We want to do one EP every six months after this for a few years. We've got the resources here now--I've just gotta sharpen my craft a bit.
The Seven Deadly Sins has been in the works for quite a while. I think it's gonna be about 21 songs--14 straight on KKC tunes, and 7 instrumentals. It's quite epic and very dark. It makes me happy to know that when people mention heavy music from this area, most people will mention Kitchen Knife Conspiracy at some point. We're very proud of that. So, we want to play some shows and get this new music out there. However, this is the first time we've ever said, "Eh, let's just not set a studio date until we're ready"--and what do ya know--it's been six years. The singer change slowed things down for a while, but now, it's on us.
Okay. That's it. I've gotta go and file taxes--which is always a pain in the ass. Like that money, doe. If we get any. Gonna get me one of dem free Obama phones.
God. I hate Tea party/Hillbillies.
Monday, January 28, 2013
What I've learned in 2013
01/29/13
Well, I couldn't have learned much. We're barely four weeks in. Wrong.
1. I learned that I'm more giddy about my team being successful then I was when I was younger.
You know, growing up a SF fan, I got spoiled a bit. I saw them win five Super Bowls total--four when I was old enough to really comprehend what was going on. They won it when I was senior in high school so, at 17, I figured a few more were on the way. But they never returned, for 18 years. So, I'm geeked up. I'm excited because, if they win--hell, even if they don't--people can start calling me a front runner again. I've only gotten to hear how shitty they are for so long. Now, when they're winning, people can tell me how I'm on the bandwagon. I love that.
2. Writing a song a week is very rewarding
This challenge, writing and recording a new tune in my studio every week, has been really, really hard. Especially while trying to adjust to a new group of students for this semester, cleaning up the Xmas aftermath--and the robotics season is about to kick up. Either way, I feel very cool about what I've done thus far. I'd like to further develop fridaynighttracks.com to include other local artists. That's my goal.
3. Writing a song a week isn't rewarding at all
Mainly because very few people give a damn. Like, I know I get a handful of plays--from friends, family, etc.--but no one else really cares. Truth be told, I only get to listen to 20% of what my friends post online. I try. But it's hard to do that all of the time. I'm not gaining anything by doing this, other than the satisfaction. I might try posting it on reverbnation and soundcloud, to see if that gets it out there further. I've got some more ideas for promotion. For right now, it's just for me and, like, five other people. But, I suppose I'm doing it for me in the first place. I dunno.
4. I want to sing
I grew up singing. It was the first thing I ever learned how to do--like, before constructing sentences. I do enjoy drumming in WC and KKC, of course. It's always been very rewarding, and I'll continue to do forever, if I have my druthers. But I want to SING in a band, I think. Perhaps even the "dreaded" COVER BAND. A lot of guys play music around here every other weekend, and make GOOD money doing it--and it's not THEIR music. But, they make it theirs--and people follow them around. I'd do that. It could be fun, and I like making money playing tunes, too. I only want to be in a cover band if I'm singing--that sounds really, really enjoyable.
5. Ambition detaches you
I'm trying to do a bunch of stuff, and it's detaching me from the simplicity of life--the small pleasures. Like, I'm trying to cram in house-cleaning session in between everything else. I usually kinda ENJOY cleaning my house. It makes me proud, and I feel good when I'm doing it--and when I'm done. There's nary a moment right now. Kinda blows.
So---that's what I've learned in the first 29 days of 2013. A January filled with eye-opening.
Well, I couldn't have learned much. We're barely four weeks in. Wrong.
1. I learned that I'm more giddy about my team being successful then I was when I was younger.
You know, growing up a SF fan, I got spoiled a bit. I saw them win five Super Bowls total--four when I was old enough to really comprehend what was going on. They won it when I was senior in high school so, at 17, I figured a few more were on the way. But they never returned, for 18 years. So, I'm geeked up. I'm excited because, if they win--hell, even if they don't--people can start calling me a front runner again. I've only gotten to hear how shitty they are for so long. Now, when they're winning, people can tell me how I'm on the bandwagon. I love that.
2. Writing a song a week is very rewarding
This challenge, writing and recording a new tune in my studio every week, has been really, really hard. Especially while trying to adjust to a new group of students for this semester, cleaning up the Xmas aftermath--and the robotics season is about to kick up. Either way, I feel very cool about what I've done thus far. I'd like to further develop fridaynighttracks.com to include other local artists. That's my goal.
3. Writing a song a week isn't rewarding at all
Mainly because very few people give a damn. Like, I know I get a handful of plays--from friends, family, etc.--but no one else really cares. Truth be told, I only get to listen to 20% of what my friends post online. I try. But it's hard to do that all of the time. I'm not gaining anything by doing this, other than the satisfaction. I might try posting it on reverbnation and soundcloud, to see if that gets it out there further. I've got some more ideas for promotion. For right now, it's just for me and, like, five other people. But, I suppose I'm doing it for me in the first place. I dunno.
4. I want to sing
I grew up singing. It was the first thing I ever learned how to do--like, before constructing sentences. I do enjoy drumming in WC and KKC, of course. It's always been very rewarding, and I'll continue to do forever, if I have my druthers. But I want to SING in a band, I think. Perhaps even the "dreaded" COVER BAND. A lot of guys play music around here every other weekend, and make GOOD money doing it--and it's not THEIR music. But, they make it theirs--and people follow them around. I'd do that. It could be fun, and I like making money playing tunes, too. I only want to be in a cover band if I'm singing--that sounds really, really enjoyable.
5. Ambition detaches you
I'm trying to do a bunch of stuff, and it's detaching me from the simplicity of life--the small pleasures. Like, I'm trying to cram in house-cleaning session in between everything else. I usually kinda ENJOY cleaning my house. It makes me proud, and I feel good when I'm doing it--and when I'm done. There's nary a moment right now. Kinda blows.
So---that's what I've learned in the first 29 days of 2013. A January filled with eye-opening.
Wednesday, December 26, 2012
My 2012 -- Year in review.
Okay, so as everyone is pointing out right now--it's snowing like the bejeesus out there. Whatever that means. So I thought this was an excellent opportunity to review my year.
Here were my goals for 2012; let's see how shitty I am.
Goals for 2012
1. Be able to record a full band, live, in the BeeHive. Bring in an outside project, and turn out a SOLID recording they would be proud to share with friends.
I recorded a few groups here and there--none for cash money. But they sound decent, overall. Thanks to Josh Roman from Mindrocket showing me a few things, I can pull this off now. I definitely still have a lot to learn. But 1 point for me.
2. New album for KKC and White Cadillac.
Um. No new KKC disc done yet. Well, it's written. Just not recorded. Very proud of "Classy Ride for Sleazy People" though--so White Cadillac delivered the audio goods. 1/2 point.
3. Full album of my OWN. One that I write and play everything on. Do a wall of sound vocal style that would make Joe Elliot ‘bloody’ proud.
No. Actually, thanks to the encouragement of a co-worker, I remixed all of my demo stuff (about 15 songs). I really want to record this properly. That's for the 2013 goals list. 0 points.
4. Hang out with friends and family more. I’ve become a bit of a hermit, so that needs to change quickly.
Yeah, I've done better with family, I think. I go to see my grandparents 90% of Sundays, and hang out with my pops a couple of times a week. Still kinda hermiting it up from time to time. Eh. 1 point.
5. Help Erin with ‘family’ finances more—I usually have her handle all the bill writing, etc. Not fair, really. I think we need to be on this ‘online bill paying’ thing full-time.
We are 100% online pay-type-people now. I know, I know, welcome to 2006. Thanks. 1 point.
6. Finish Erin’s ‘awesome room’.
A couple of things need moved on shelves, but everything is here, and it is awesome. I accomplished this over the summer. 1 point
7. Minimalist leaning—become less needy of “stuff”.
Just got a Wii U, autographed stuff from the Niners, tons of shirts, boatloads of CDs, and a badassed snowblower to top all others. Miserable fail. 0 points
8. Practice patience—learn more about Buddhism.
I quit in the middle of a round of golf this summer. I'm patient. But I haven't gotten MORE patient. And I still never finished my Thich Nhat Hanh book. I'm awful. 0 points
9. Write four-five short stories—get ONE published.
I wrote another short story this year. But didn't finish 4 or five, and got zero published. 0 points
10. Break 85 for 18 on the course. I can do this in 2012—especially if I achieve goal #8 first.
I thought this one was in the BAG in June. I was shooting around 90. Then, I got new clubs, decided to change my swing, and hacked it around everywhere, toiling in the upper 90s/lower 100s for three months. I don't give myself minus points. But if there was ever a time I should, this would be it. 0 points
Total 4.5/10 points -- Ugh. That's embarrassing.
Goals for 2013
1. Finish a solo album.
2. Clean my garage, and organize it.
3. Finish seven video games, in their entirety.
4. Learn guitar--the basic chords, at least. This will help me in my songwriting SO much.
5. Release KKC's "Seven Deadly Sins"--there's no WAY I'm not getting this point at the end of the year.
6. Release one new song every week (or cover tune) on Soundcloud--it must be posted by the end of Friday night--except if I'm on, like, vacation or something.
7. Get Erin an online jewelry store. The stuff she's making is AWESOME, so I MUST get her stuff up for sale.
8. Keep this home consistently clean.
9. Become a better golfer. No "set score" this year.
10. Read six books--for fun. Not because I have to.
My Favorite Songs of 2012:
These didn't have to be RELEASED in 2012. If I encountered them for the first time this year, and I listened to it a boatload of times, then it's on here. (These are in no particular order--just how I'm putting them on CDs for people)
1. "How" - Regina Spektor
2. "Bones of Birds" - Soundgarden
3. "Falling" - Poema
4. "Death Knell" - Ghost
5. "Violet Rays" - Smashing Pumpkins
6. "Bucket List" - Nelly Furtado
7. "Revenge" - Danger Mouse / Sparklehorse
8. "My Boy" - Anneke van Giersbergen
9. "Reunion" - M83
10. "Scraping the Walls" - God Forbid
11. "How They Want Me to Be" - Best Coast
12. "Tempest" - Deftones
13. "Follow Me" - Muse
14. "Love Interruption" - Jack White
15. "Stray Heart" - Green Day
16. "Foolsong" - Baroness
17. "Drag Ropes" - Storm Corrosion
18. "Say Goodbye" - Norah Jones
19. "The Luckiest" (Ben Folds) - as performed by Washington University in St. Louis Mosaic Whispers
20. "Shards of Love" - Woods of Ypres
21. "September Song" - Willie Nelson
22. "Where We Belong" - Devin Townsend Project
23. "Madness" - Muse
24. "The Racing Heart" - Katatonia
25. "'Til You" - Alanis Morissette
26. "Apricots" - Poema
27. "One More Summer" - No Doubt
28. "Anteroom" - EMA
29. "Days Go By" - The Offspring
30. "Eula" - Baroness
31. "Werewolf" - Fiona Apple
32. "Harakiri" - Serj Tankian
33. "That's Why God Made the Radio" - The Beach Boys
34. "Divine" - Devin Townsend Project
35. "I Miss the Misery" - Halestorm
36. "Twinkler" - Baroness
37. "In the Wee Small Hours" - Frank Sinatra
My Top 10 albums of 2012 (In order, with #1 being the most bombassed): *Once again, as long as I first listened to the disc this year, I put it on the list*
10. Goatwhore - "Blood for the Master" 2012
A brilliant mix of black metal, death metal and thrash. Damnit. I really wanted to use the oxford comma in that last sentence.
9. Fiona Apple - "The Idler Wheel..." 2012
Yeah. I'm not gonna type the whole album title. At first, this album didn't do it for me. But then, it grew on me--like an infection. Not as good as "Extraordinary Machine" in my opinion--but close.
8. Deftones - "Koi No Yokan" 2012
Some say this is just like "Diamond Eyes Part 2"--but I severely disagree. The choruses on this album are extremely poppy and memorable. That's when the Deftones are at their best.
7. Storm Corrosion - "Storm Corrosion" 2012
I looked forward to this album for a long time, and it did NOT disappoint. A collab between Steven from Porcupine Tree and Mikael from Opeth. It sounds like a mixture of Steven from Porcupine Tree and Mikael from Opeth. Which means it's awesome.
6. Dying Fetus - "Reign Supreme" 2012
The stompiest death metal album since Internal Bleeding's "Driven to Conquer" almost a decade ago. These guys are just super-talented.
5. Woods of Ypres - "Woods 4: The Green Album" 2011
The singer/songwriter died a year ago this week in a car crash--and I revisited their music. I'm so glad I did. I was missing out. Very sad he'll never do more music.
4. Frank Sinatra - "In the Wee Small Hours" 1955
While listening to the first album on the list of "1001 Albums You Must Hear Before You Die"--I fell in love. I listened to this album 75 times this year. I'm not exaggerating.
3. Ghost - "Opus Eponymous" 2010
I listened to this album once in 2011--then a bunch more at the beginning of this year. What would Deep Purple sound like if they were slightly satanic? Probably like Ghost.
2. Poema - "Remembering You" 2012
I can't say that this shouldn't just be at number one. I listened to this a ton--and I know every word. The problem lies in the fact that I feel like a 17-year-old girl when I'm singing it, because I'm pretty sure that's the intended listening demographic. But it's like bubble gum in my ears, covered in cotton candy. It's so good. I just can't help myself. I'd say it's a guilty pleasure, but it's too damned good to feel guilty about it.
1. Baroness - "Yellow & Green" 2012
This is a double disc, which is dangerous. You can really usually throw away five or six songs on a two-disc outing--but not here. The songs here are just dark and memorable. Hauntingly gorgeous.
Okay. Onward to 2013. The ten goals I set for myself here are impossible. Oh well. I'll give 'er a go.
Here were my goals for 2012; let's see how shitty I am.
Goals for 2012
1. Be able to record a full band, live, in the BeeHive. Bring in an outside project, and turn out a SOLID recording they would be proud to share with friends.
I recorded a few groups here and there--none for cash money. But they sound decent, overall. Thanks to Josh Roman from Mindrocket showing me a few things, I can pull this off now. I definitely still have a lot to learn. But 1 point for me.
2. New album for KKC and White Cadillac.
Um. No new KKC disc done yet. Well, it's written. Just not recorded. Very proud of "Classy Ride for Sleazy People" though--so White Cadillac delivered the audio goods. 1/2 point.
3. Full album of my OWN. One that I write and play everything on. Do a wall of sound vocal style that would make Joe Elliot ‘bloody’ proud.
No. Actually, thanks to the encouragement of a co-worker, I remixed all of my demo stuff (about 15 songs). I really want to record this properly. That's for the 2013 goals list. 0 points.
4. Hang out with friends and family more. I’ve become a bit of a hermit, so that needs to change quickly.
Yeah, I've done better with family, I think. I go to see my grandparents 90% of Sundays, and hang out with my pops a couple of times a week. Still kinda hermiting it up from time to time. Eh. 1 point.
5. Help Erin with ‘family’ finances more—I usually have her handle all the bill writing, etc. Not fair, really. I think we need to be on this ‘online bill paying’ thing full-time.
We are 100% online pay-type-people now. I know, I know, welcome to 2006. Thanks. 1 point.
6. Finish Erin’s ‘awesome room’.
A couple of things need moved on shelves, but everything is here, and it is awesome. I accomplished this over the summer. 1 point
7. Minimalist leaning—become less needy of “stuff”.
Just got a Wii U, autographed stuff from the Niners, tons of shirts, boatloads of CDs, and a badassed snowblower to top all others. Miserable fail. 0 points
8. Practice patience—learn more about Buddhism.
I quit in the middle of a round of golf this summer. I'm patient. But I haven't gotten MORE patient. And I still never finished my Thich Nhat Hanh book. I'm awful. 0 points
9. Write four-five short stories—get ONE published.
I wrote another short story this year. But didn't finish 4 or five, and got zero published. 0 points
10. Break 85 for 18 on the course. I can do this in 2012—especially if I achieve goal #8 first.
I thought this one was in the BAG in June. I was shooting around 90. Then, I got new clubs, decided to change my swing, and hacked it around everywhere, toiling in the upper 90s/lower 100s for three months. I don't give myself minus points. But if there was ever a time I should, this would be it. 0 points
Total 4.5/10 points -- Ugh. That's embarrassing.
Goals for 2013
1. Finish a solo album.
2. Clean my garage, and organize it.
3. Finish seven video games, in their entirety.
4. Learn guitar--the basic chords, at least. This will help me in my songwriting SO much.
5. Release KKC's "Seven Deadly Sins"--there's no WAY I'm not getting this point at the end of the year.
6. Release one new song every week (or cover tune) on Soundcloud--it must be posted by the end of Friday night--except if I'm on, like, vacation or something.
7. Get Erin an online jewelry store. The stuff she's making is AWESOME, so I MUST get her stuff up for sale.
8. Keep this home consistently clean.
9. Become a better golfer. No "set score" this year.
10. Read six books--for fun. Not because I have to.
My Favorite Songs of 2012:
These didn't have to be RELEASED in 2012. If I encountered them for the first time this year, and I listened to it a boatload of times, then it's on here. (These are in no particular order--just how I'm putting them on CDs for people)
1. "How" - Regina Spektor
4. "Death Knell" - Ghost
My Top 10 albums of 2012 (In order, with #1 being the most bombassed): *Once again, as long as I first listened to the disc this year, I put it on the list*
10. Goatwhore - "Blood for the Master" 2012
A brilliant mix of black metal, death metal and thrash. Damnit. I really wanted to use the oxford comma in that last sentence.
9. Fiona Apple - "The Idler Wheel..." 2012
Yeah. I'm not gonna type the whole album title. At first, this album didn't do it for me. But then, it grew on me--like an infection. Not as good as "Extraordinary Machine" in my opinion--but close.
8. Deftones - "Koi No Yokan" 2012
Some say this is just like "Diamond Eyes Part 2"--but I severely disagree. The choruses on this album are extremely poppy and memorable. That's when the Deftones are at their best.
7. Storm Corrosion - "Storm Corrosion" 2012
I looked forward to this album for a long time, and it did NOT disappoint. A collab between Steven from Porcupine Tree and Mikael from Opeth. It sounds like a mixture of Steven from Porcupine Tree and Mikael from Opeth. Which means it's awesome.
6. Dying Fetus - "Reign Supreme" 2012
The stompiest death metal album since Internal Bleeding's "Driven to Conquer" almost a decade ago. These guys are just super-talented.
5. Woods of Ypres - "Woods 4: The Green Album" 2011
The singer/songwriter died a year ago this week in a car crash--and I revisited their music. I'm so glad I did. I was missing out. Very sad he'll never do more music.
4. Frank Sinatra - "In the Wee Small Hours" 1955
While listening to the first album on the list of "1001 Albums You Must Hear Before You Die"--I fell in love. I listened to this album 75 times this year. I'm not exaggerating.
3. Ghost - "Opus Eponymous" 2010
I listened to this album once in 2011--then a bunch more at the beginning of this year. What would Deep Purple sound like if they were slightly satanic? Probably like Ghost.
2. Poema - "Remembering You" 2012
I can't say that this shouldn't just be at number one. I listened to this a ton--and I know every word. The problem lies in the fact that I feel like a 17-year-old girl when I'm singing it, because I'm pretty sure that's the intended listening demographic. But it's like bubble gum in my ears, covered in cotton candy. It's so good. I just can't help myself. I'd say it's a guilty pleasure, but it's too damned good to feel guilty about it.
1. Baroness - "Yellow & Green" 2012
This is a double disc, which is dangerous. You can really usually throw away five or six songs on a two-disc outing--but not here. The songs here are just dark and memorable. Hauntingly gorgeous.
Okay. Onward to 2013. The ten goals I set for myself here are impossible. Oh well. I'll give 'er a go.
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
Girls and Golf: A Role Reversal
10/23/12
I know it's hard to fathom, but I wasn't always a super-smooth mega-hulk of a man. No, throughout my middle school and high school years, I was quite the recluse. I didn't feel confident or outgoing. I felt smart enough--just not very brave. And girls--that was a different beast all together. I knew they were different, and yet, very much the same. There was a certain apprehension I felt around the female species, and it never really ironed itself out until college, really. I knew it was awesome being around them. But my awkwardness was magnified to such immense proportions...I just didn't know what to do around them. Be funny? Be strange? Be quiet?
I figured all that stuff out, though, eventually. Or, at least, I found someone willing to put up with my awkwardness and shortcomings. She's done so since I was 19. Damn. It feels like yesterday.
But my awkwardness with girls has been replaced by an awkwardness with golf. I wasted ten more bucks at the Golf Dome again today, and I'm just fucking terrible--really. I mean, I can hack my way to a 98 or 97. It's never pretty. I have a couple of good chips and putts. But everything else is awful.
And I look around at the douchebaggery at the dome--you know, 24 year old dudes who you know are crushing beer cans on their faces and farting on each other at parties. They can hit the ball. I thought to myself, "Why does this game work out for them, but not for me? I can't do that."
Then it hit me. That's how it used to be with girls when I was in high school. I knew that the dudes who were always with girls--different girls--every week, were pretty shitty people over all. But it wasn't in my skill set. Now, girls, fairly figured out. Well, at least one girl. Many of the rest of them still seem a bit kooky, from afar. But golf is just never going to treat me well. I can't figure it out. I've had friends at the range--several of them--trying to help me out. But I feel like Steve Carell in 40-Year-Old Virgin--thanks for the tips, but it's obviously not helping me. I've even paid instructors. Like, four of them. If the golf course is the Sadie Hawkins dance, I'm the dude standing by the punch, hands in my pockets, wishing I was back at home playing Nintendo instead.
I know it's hard to fathom, but I wasn't always a super-smooth mega-hulk of a man. No, throughout my middle school and high school years, I was quite the recluse. I didn't feel confident or outgoing. I felt smart enough--just not very brave. And girls--that was a different beast all together. I knew they were different, and yet, very much the same. There was a certain apprehension I felt around the female species, and it never really ironed itself out until college, really. I knew it was awesome being around them. But my awkwardness was magnified to such immense proportions...I just didn't know what to do around them. Be funny? Be strange? Be quiet?
I figured all that stuff out, though, eventually. Or, at least, I found someone willing to put up with my awkwardness and shortcomings. She's done so since I was 19. Damn. It feels like yesterday.
But my awkwardness with girls has been replaced by an awkwardness with golf. I wasted ten more bucks at the Golf Dome again today, and I'm just fucking terrible--really. I mean, I can hack my way to a 98 or 97. It's never pretty. I have a couple of good chips and putts. But everything else is awful.
And I look around at the douchebaggery at the dome--you know, 24 year old dudes who you know are crushing beer cans on their faces and farting on each other at parties. They can hit the ball. I thought to myself, "Why does this game work out for them, but not for me? I can't do that."
Then it hit me. That's how it used to be with girls when I was in high school. I knew that the dudes who were always with girls--different girls--every week, were pretty shitty people over all. But it wasn't in my skill set. Now, girls, fairly figured out. Well, at least one girl. Many of the rest of them still seem a bit kooky, from afar. But golf is just never going to treat me well. I can't figure it out. I've had friends at the range--several of them--trying to help me out. But I feel like Steve Carell in 40-Year-Old Virgin--thanks for the tips, but it's obviously not helping me. I've even paid instructors. Like, four of them. If the golf course is the Sadie Hawkins dance, I'm the dude standing by the punch, hands in my pockets, wishing I was back at home playing Nintendo instead.
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